A Finnish study analyzed data from all legal unions between 2003 and 2020 and confirmed that lesbian couples’ divorce rate is the highest rate out of all same-sex and different-sex divorces. 1 The study included 5,300 same-sex couples (3,412 lesbian couples and 1,892 gay couples) and over 450,000 different-sex couples. The results show that within 10 years of marriage, 41% of the lesbian couples studied had divorced as opposed to only 27% of gay couples and 22% percent of different-sex couples.1 This brings up the importance of knowing what to expect for lesbian couples should they plan to divorce.
Asset splitting and ownership
When dividing property between divorcing spouses the court only looks at property purchased during the marriage, which is appropriately titled as “Marital Property”. Due to legal marriage not being available to same‑sex couples until relatively recently (2015), many couples have lived together for years before getting married, during which they acquired assets together that would otherwise have been considered Marital Property if they were married. That in and of itself is can lead to a potential unfair division as it’s left to the couple to divide rather than a neutral third party, but for couples who have unequal incomes, the lower-earning partner may find themselves missing out legal claim to on an unusually large proportion of assets due to this technicality. An asset being deemed Marital Property, in a Community Property state like WI, means it is automatically considered half owned by each spouse. When an asset is purchased outside of marriage it is only owned by the purchaser. Here’s an example of how this could be troublesome: Jennifer and Maria have been together since 1999 and were married in 2017. In 2010, they decide to buy a home and start a family. Jennifer is an engineer and earns substantially more than Maria, who works for a small non-profit part-time. Because Jennfier earns a higher income and has more money saved she put down the down payment and placed the loan and home in her name. Each month Maria paid ½ of the mortgage costs as well as ½ of all the maintenance costs. Fast forward to now, 9 years later, when they look at their assets to be divided between them at divorce, this asset will not be counted as it was purchased prior to the marriage and is solely in Jennifer’s name. There is no recourse for Maria in this situation.
Unequal incomes
When a couple earns disproportionate incomes it can often lead to the lower-earner being punished by going up a tax bracket resulting in them paying a higher tax bill than they would have as an individual filer. Similarly, the higher income-earner may find themselves in a different tax bracket, too, but this time in a lower bracket. This may be forgotten or come as a surprise to some when they file their first individual tax return, and obviously can be influential to one’s bottom line. Let’s take a look at how this works using the same example as above, now assigning incomes to Jennifer and Maria. Jennifer’s taxable income is $165,000 and Maria’s income is $32,000. In simplistic terms, together they are in the 22% tax bracket, but separately, Jennifer is in the 24% tax bracket and Maria is in the 12% bracket (see 2026 federal tax brackets shown below). For Maria’s sake, after the divorce she will be able to enjoy a lower tax bracket, but that won’t be true for Jennifer, she will be in an even higher tax bracket.
Social Security Benefits
Lower-earning partners who have been in a long-term marriage may be able to receive a special benefit due to the longevity of their marriage. For couples who were married at least 10 years they have the ability to receive Social Security benefits based on either their own work history or their spouse’s (or ex-spouse’s). They get the higher benefit of either 100% of the lower-earning spouse’s benefit or 50% of the higher-earning spouse’s benefit at their Full Retirement Age (typically age 67). This can mean a significant difference in benefits for someone who was a lower-earning worker. And what’s more is, it doesn’t affect the higher-earning partner’s benefit in any way. Sadly, because same-sex marriage wasn’t legal until just a little over 10 years ago it’s not as easy to qualify for this benefit.
Child custody & Parental Rights
Another important factor to consider in same-sex divorce is child custody. Same-sex couples may have adopted children or have children from previous relationships, and determining custody arrangements can be complex. In the case of two ciswomen, or two cismen, only one parent may be the biological parent. If the child was born prior to marriage the non-biological parent can only be granted parental rights if they completed a second‑parent adoption (also referred to as stepparent adoption or co-parent adoption in different states). Unfortunately, it isn’t much different if you were married because most states have outdated language in their statutes that use “mother/father” verbiage, clearly excluding same-sex parents. In fact, Wisconsin’s statutes still contain “mother,” “father,” “paternity,” “man,” and “wife” in many sections. 2 A recommended fail-safe approach is for all couples to go through a second-parent adoption regardless of which state you live in as it’s the only guaranteed way for both parents to be acknowledged as legal parents. 2
If you’re considering divorce, or have recently gone through a divorce, consider taking the next step in securing your future by hiring a Financial Planning professional so you can work through these potential issues and come out stronger on the other side.
1“Same-Sex and Different-Sex Couples’ Divorce Risks: The Role of Cohabitation and Childbearing,” Journal of Marriage and Family. 9 September 2025.
2“Securing LGBTQ+ Parentage by State: Stepparent, Second Parent, and Confirmatory Adoption Family Equality.” FamilyEquality.org. 24 October 2023.